“Grief is like the ocean; it comes in waves, ebbing and flowing. Sometimes the water is calm, and sometimes it is overwhelming.” – Vikki Harrison

What’s involved in grieving the losses associated with betrayal by a partner? What are the different steps we need to take?

1. First, we need to name the different losses associated with betrayal. Don’t limit this to a few obvious ones like loss of trust, or loss of self-esteem. There will be layers and layers of losses. In fact, once you start making a list of the loses, you might find that you are writing pages and pages.

Try to be as specific and detailed as you can. Some examples of things people write include:

“I used to feel ok (even good) about my appearance. But I never feel beautiful now. I’m always criticizing my looks and figure … and I always…