Unhealthy Control Versus Healthy Boundaries

There are many, many addicts who break free of their addiction. They turn their back on the past and do the hard work that’s required (And it is hard work as the addiction’s changed their brain.)

Other addicts try and fail. Perhaps they still love their addiction. They feel ambivalent, and aren’t sure they want to change. This is so distressing for the partner or spouse.

So, what should you do? How do you help yourself, and them, when you’re not sure that the addict is committed to being sober?

Sometimes our love for that person, and our own anxieties around being alone, or starting over on our own, can cause us to control every aspect of their life. This is really not surprising since we’re living with such fear. And their choices and decisions affect our lives as well.

But you can’t control another. This is never going to…